Episode 13 – Johnny Unicorn Cleans His Room!


In this exciting episode of the Johnny Unicorn Show, I motivate myself to clean my room by talking to my podcast listeners as I do it. Does that sound exciting? Does it sound boring? Either way, I’m sure you’ll be right as you join me in cleaning my room.

Warning: The audio quality is pretty bad, since I’m moving around a lot. It’s a little like the jogging episode.

Thank you for listening!

download | iTunes | RSS

Episode 12 – Zorznijor – “Hoser Instrumental Archive” Complete Analysis


In episode 12 of the Johnny Unicorn Show, you’ll get a song by song analysis of the most under-rated pre-amateur triple demo album of 2016! Hear behind-the-scenes stories! Get the inside info on the 21st century’s most hard-to-categorize artist! Learn a little about yourself along the way, perhaps! Then go listen to the album at full volume!

download | iTunes | RSS

Episode 11 – Jeff Salamander and Johnny Unicorn Listen to Lady Gaga!


In this very exciting episode, I sit down with local singer/socialite Jeff Salamander, and we put on the bold new masterpiece from the queen of outlandishness herself, Lady Gaga. “Joanne,” in typical fourth-album fashion marks a departure for this pop star into realms previously unknown. If her third album was just getting her feet wet, this album is her up to her waist. Listen to me and Jeff as we analyze, commentate, and go gaga over this fabulous anthem for post-naive U.S.A.

download | iTunes | RSS

Topics discussed:
LADY GAGA! (obviously)
Jeff’s new video, “Alvarado”

Episode 10 – Amateur Journalism: The Anti-Trump Protests In Seattle


I had the pleasure of attending two Seattle protests the weekend of Donald Trump’s inauguration. On this episode I talk about it, and share with you the audio I recorded there.

I’ve never done anything journalistic before. I don’t even have a journal. But I figured it couldn’t be that hard to record some people and cut all the clips together into a listenable segment. Could it?

There’s only one way to find out (contains swears):

download | iTunes | RSS

Episode 9 – Daniel Desrosiers! And surprise guests, Jeff and Naomi!

I was walking around the Capitol Hill neighborhood of Seattle, trying to find a quiet coffeeshop. Having failed at that project, I texted Daniel Timothy Desrosiers of the band His Many Colored Fruit to see if he was available for a podcast session. He was! Later on, Jeff and Naomi show up, and we had to hook up another machine in order to mic everybody. It was worth it!

Dan lives right next to some powerful radio antennas, so there was a lot of radio interference. But despite that, we had a very fruitful conversation. Take a listen, but beware: the conversation gets progressively more obscene. Expect a couple of dozen swear words in this nearly 2 hour conversation.

download | iTunes | RSS

Topics discussed:
Small talk
Meaty clackers
Opt-out pop-in
Spider beard

Episode 8 – 2016, the Year of Zorznijor


Hello! Let me tell you about my momentous year of 2016. In 2016 I did so much stuff that I had a hard time remembering all of it. This podcast episode is my attempt at recounting every artistic thing I did in the year 2016. Also, I give you a sneak peak into what to expect from me in the year 2017. Enjoy!

download | iTunes | RSS

Topics discussed:

Motern Media
Blender 3d
Jesse Mercury

Episode 6 – Johnny Unicorn Goes Jogging!


In the interest of keeping this podcast new and fresh every episode, I’ve come up with a new and fresh way to do the show. While jogging!

You’ve NEVER heard a podcast like this. I went jogging, and recorded the whole thing. It is completely unedited, and it’s thrillingly amateur production. As a bonus, I got over a big fear I’ve had of going out in public and talking to myself into a recording device. You’ve always wanted to hear someone jogging, and NOW YOU CAN!

download | iTunes | RSS

Topics discussed (spoiler alert!):
Apartment complexes replacing houses
Disgusting fruit
Ultimate frisbee
Being in public
Dogs in tennis courts
People drawing penises on murals
I-90 bridge

Episode 4 – Casual Conversation With My Brother About Aesthetics

I return with my brother for a second episode to discuss mainly music. Music we like, music other people like, music we make. Also, philosophy:

download | iTunes | RSS

Topics discussed:
Wilho Elo
the Cure
Jacques Ranciere (the Politics of Aesthetics)
Douglas Rushkoff (Present Shock)
Bossa Nova
Michael Jackson’s grunting
The price of Genesis tickets
Leonard Cohen